Constant

One thing remains constant. I don't know what I want or what I should do.

I leave once again for Southeast Asia in a few days. After I arrive I will meet up with my nurse friend from last year and we will spend a few days in Bali together. I will also be visiting the students have a friend who teaches English in the Thai countryside. That's about all that is relatively certain about the trip.

I'm still in love with the Filipina, still unsure if I should ignore that and move on, or ignore the needy and controlling aspects of her personality and return to her. Meanwhile there have been a couple more dates with the poly woman. Still, I was in bed twice with the Filipina this weekend, and once with the poly woman - and again I kinda wanted to avoid the latter.

I asked the question once - should I be holding out for someone who is the best of all my ex-girlfriends? The answer was yes, but I don't think I've properly started holding out yet.

I need to quit stalling and make a decision.

I needs to stop remaining constant.